#36: Slapdash (1988)

The Powermaster gimmick, like all of the 'Master' conceits, is one of my favourites. This isn't news to anyone who reads this blog, to be perfectly honest. But the Powermaster flavour is a particular favourite of mine these days, due to Masterforce, the Japanese version of events, where the gimmick is repurposed somewhat. The basic story is this; Nebulons (or humans in Masterforce) power the Transformers, making them even more powerful than before. (In Japan, the human IS the Transformer. They turn into an engine and merge with the robot, so the huan becomes the robot, effectively.) I just love this idea, especially the wetsren version, because the Nebulons had to consume HUGE amounts of food for it to become fuel, effectively. The thought of Hi-Q scarfing down Elvis-like proportions of burgers and cake amuses me. I'm a bit odd.

Slapdash is another of those characters that wasn't used in fiction much. He was introduced in the comics, was in a few stories, and then disappeared due to the fact that no one could be bothered writing him at that point. The G1 cartoon had ended too, meaning that really there was only one choice; go to Japan.

Road King, as he was known in Japan, was a completely different character to Slapdash. There, he was a British racing driver, the 'British Wolf', with an eye for the ladies and a celebrity attitude. He certainly wasn't Slapdash, forgetting to take along his partner Lube (yes, yes, I know) which meant that he couldn't transform. If I'm being honest, Road King's a bit cooler than Slapdash. I'd rather he be Road King. I like Masterforce. A lot.

The toy is better than it looks. I mean, it's not perfect, but it certainly isn't as bad as it first appears. It does have a little bit of articulation, and the alt-mode is great. Sadly, it is a bit simplistic, and that's mainly down to gimmick issues. The fact that the toy is in Fisher-Pricey colours doesn't help, really. But like all the Powermasters, it's a solid enough toy with lots of replay value.

Slapdash suffers from what a lot of later-era Transformers suffer from - fiction drought. Because the cartoon had finished, and the comic was concentrating on a story arc rather than selling toys too much (toys were sold through the comic stories - but Furman was taking over by this point and the Matrix Quest was king, effectively), so some of the later era toys maybe didn't get the pushes that earlier toys did. Which is why I love the Japanese versions of these characters so much - they give these toys a purpose, a story. And it's a good story, too. If you haven't ever checked Masterforce out - do so, and do yourself a massive favour.

#35: Weirdwolf (1987)

Weirdwolf is one of those guys that's just "there". He doesn't really do anything, say anything interesting or noteworthy, or make any difference to any situation he's in. And by that I don't mean he didn't make a difference in the George Bailey "every man makes a difference" way. I mean, in terms of Generation One fiction (even the Japanese Headmasters series), Weirdwolf did absolutely nothing. Which to me at least, is incredibly frustrating. Because Weirdwolf, according to his Tech Spec bio, was immensely interesting and a great character. If used correctly, he could have been a positive boon to G1 fiction. Still could, if anyone wished to go down that direction. Weirdwolf, basically, is a psychopath. But not in the foaming at the mouth, utter mental, WWF wrestler circa 1986 way. No, he's insane in the Patrick Bateman "needs to return some video tapes" way. Even if the singsong voice and backwards way of talking thing's a bit of a giveaway. Maybe Drusilla from Buffy is a better fit for Weirdwolf, on second thought.

Regardless, here's an example of yet another completely wasted character from G1. This appears to be a running thread through this blog. I guess my point is that we as kids probably made more out of a lot of these characters than the writers did. Not that I'm having a go at the writers, they were under pressure to get things done quickly, they had to concentrate on a few characters perhaps, and other such concerns. Even so, it irks me occasionally, looking back through these Tech Specs, that an awful lot of good writing fodder went unnoticed.

Weirdwolf's toy is great. A teal, yellow and cream wolf. I mean, obviously, right? It's 1987, after all. And the Headmaster conceit has always been one of my favourites. It used to be that I really only liked the Japanese explanation, with the head being the robot, controlling the lifeless body, but I think I'm coming around to the Western explanation these days, that the little guy is organic, and transforms into the head of the robot, and the two personalities mesh and become one. It's such a crazy idea, it just might work. Kind of like making a wolf out of yellow and teal parts.

Weirdwolf then, is a guy looking for a part. Or a part looking for a guy. Whatever he is, I like him. And if he does happen to ever appear in a film or new cartoon, I want Juliet Landau voicing him. Or Frank Oz. Whoever's cheaper.

#34: Groove (1986)

Groove was one of the many Generation One Autobots that was openly a pacifist, not wanting to fight, yet knowing they had to, to end the war they hated so very much. He joined such luminaries as First Aid, Beachcomber and Fixit, even the Pretender Monster Slog to a degree. Sadly, as with most of the component parts of any combiner in G1, Groove was almost faceless, and certainly characterless, even in the comics. Of course the commanders got a lot of face time, but the rest did not. Not unless you were Swindle, anyway. Or even the Aerialbots. Personally, I think that's a crying shame, I'd take a well done character study of Defensor and his components over anything to do with the Aerialbots, but there you go.

As usual with characters that get left behind sometimes, Groove would have been a good character to have a look at in depth, and see what makes him tick. A pacifist who fights to protect people? Who really just wants to explore the world he's in and not have to fight all the time? That, to me, would be a great thing to look into and examine. Sadly, I guess it doesn't make for an exciting kid's show or comic, and certainly wouldn't sell toys. Still, maybe one day IDW will give it a go. I live in hope.

Let's not mince words here; Groove's toy is terrible. It kinda has to be, it's a combiner limb. So by necessity it could haver have been an amazingly articulated and engineered toy, and especially not in 1986. But even given that, he's awful. The bike mode isn't too bad, although it's not exactly interesting; it's the robot mode that's the stinker here. The transformation is feet out, front of the bike down and rotate arms. Micromasters have more intricate conversions than that. Again, by necessity, but still. Not great.

The thing about combiner limbs is that you have to forgive them a lot, and therefore have to have a reason to forgive them. In Groove's case, it's the Tech Specs. Which is a case in point about why I love them so much. Without that, Groove would just be a poor toy with not a lot going for him apart from the fact that he's Defensor's leg. WITH the Tech Spec bio of course, he's a great and interesting character, which makes me like the toy a whole lot more. Tech Specs. Gawd bless 'em.

#33: Octane (1986)

I seem to recall (and forgive me if my memory is a little hazy) that my friend Jeremy had Octane when we were at school together. Certainly someone owned him. Because I remember quite clearly thinking that he wasn't very good. Not because the toy was bad or anything, even in 1986 I was quite aware that toy engineering had it's limitations. No, I didn't think he was much cop because he didn't have an offensive alt-mode. He transformed into a 767 jet and a fuel tanker, see. Not the usual military vehicles or outwardly offensive modes for a Decepticon.

Nearly 30 years later, and I see that it was actually a stroke of genius; Octane's capabilities were much more insidious then firing a weapon, or ripping someone apart. He, in fact, is one of the most evil beings in the whole universe; a bean counter. Those people who can deny life by a stroke of a pen, because it's not economically viable to keep you alive. Effectively, he's the Decepticon equivalent of a civil servant.

This was actually played out a little bit in the cartoon; Octane would make business decisions rather than out and out fight the Autobots. Even at the cost of his membership of the Decepticons. This meant that he'd join the Autobots for a little while, andeven become marginally noble, even being called 'good buddy' by Sandstorm; this slightly loses it's lustre though, when you find that all of this should be happening to Blitzwing, who was legitimately kicked out of the Decepticons by Galvatron at the end of 'Five Faces of Darkness'.

Even then, it would seem that the writers never really looked at Octane's Tech Spec bio. He was never really a bully, never really loud. He was just a businessman, in the same vein as Swindle. The comics have attempted to correct this on a few occasions, but as always, Octane ends up being nothing more than a Decepticon goon, a thug who gets his rear linkage handed to him on most occasions. These days he's not even called Octane anymore...

The toy, as I stated earlier, does have issues. The tanker mode doesn't really look like a tanker, more a big silver shiny cylinder with half a robot stuck on the front. Jet mode is a lot better, which leades me to believe that might have been the first of the modes that was designed. Robot mode is the best of the three modes, but his legs do suffer due to his three-mode configuration. By which I mean, they don't move. It's a G1 toy though. You get used to that. The detail, especially on his face, is great though. What G1 toys lack in articulation, they always make up for in character.

Octane then, is a toy and a character that grew on me over 30 years. I now think that he should be given a much more prominent role in the Transformers universe. In fact, I think that he, Swindle and Greasepit should all either be involved in the recent Dallas remake somehow, or team up and make a Cybertronian version of The Apprentice. You're fired!

#32: Hot Rod Patrol (1990)

The Hot Rod Patrol are a great example of the creativity that the Micromaster line of Transformers produced; I could be wrong, but I think it was because of the fact that they cost a heck of a lot less to produce, which gave the designers more leaway to come up with things that maybe they wouldn't be able to if the toys had been of a bigger size. Hence, four 1950's style hot rod cars, in neon colourings. Neon had already started to creep into Transformers colour schemes by this point, but after 1990 or so, Hasbro just went crazy with the gimmick, splashing it on everything. Not that I'm complaining, of course. I happen to love everything neon.

Aside from a cartoon advertising them, the Hot Rods didn't get any fiction until the quite frankly risible Micromasters mini-series comic by Dreamwave, where, as stated in this blog previously, art wasn't great, and the writing was such that it rendered any attempt at characterisation of the Micros null and void, as they were pretty much interchangably bland and blank. A shame. Still, you never know. Some amazing soul may one day write the Micromaster epic to end all epics. One day, I may even try that myself.

Aside from Greaser (the orange guy) who is just weird, the Hot Rodders are pretty standard transforming Micromaster cars - the hook with them is the 1950's motif and theme. If you don't like that, then they're never going to grab you, but I've not met many who at least don't see the charm of them. The neon is obviously a great draw with me too; how can you not love something that's neon orang, even if his legs look back to front? You can't, obviously. I always liked the fact that they're portrayed as complete punks in the bio; I always imagine them being voiced by James Dean, Marlon Brando and Henry Winkler, with possibly Tom Wilson as Big Daddy. Biff Tannen rules, McFly.

#31: Thrust (1985)

Thrust will always be my second favourite version of the Seeker mould, after Dirge of course. Why, Ihear you ask? Well, he was actually the first version of the Seeker mould that I ever saw. My friend Rob had him, see, and would bring the toy to school to play with most days. This was about 1985-ish, possibly early 1986. I was always fascinated with Thrust, the fact that his wings were so odd-looking, the way it transformed, and the shade of burgundy-maroon he was coloured. There was just something so cool about that toy, I loved it. I didn't care that you had to fit different parts on him to make him look like a robot, or that he even looked silly with the cone head up (although I don't recall that was done often; we didn't really have season 2 of the G1 cartoon over here, so the conehead thing was never really a thing). Part of the reason I bought Dirge was the fact that I wanted a Thrust-like toy.

Another reason to like Thrust is his Tech Spec bio. A loudmouthed braggart who's also a bully? Who doesn't like roleplaying that in the playground? Sure, he's almost a 'Thundercracker-lite', but who cares? T-Cracker only REALLY became interesting when IDW started writing him. Thrust was where it was at.

Sadly, the cartoon creators didn't agree with me on that one, and poor old Thrust ended up in the 'dumb goon' role, beating up Autobots, getting trashed by other Autobots, and not doing much else. The same was true of the comics; he was always around as muscle, but never got to do anything interesting. In fact, the most interesting thing that's happened to him in fiction is getting a whole building dropped on him in the IDW comics. That's it.

The toy, as I said before, is great. Yes, seeker mould again, but the extras make up for the genericness of the mould. The wings in particular are great, the massive turbines that look like they really do some sonic damage, and the rear fins, the plane mode just screams out 'I'm from the 80's!' The stickers really finished the look off too, and it's great that Reprolabels did a new set of them for the Generations version of Thrust, seeing that toy on a shelf really is like taking a trip back through time.

Hopefully Thrust isn't gone from the IDWverse. I'd like to see a different take on the character, a bit of insecurity and inner turmoil. Because let's face it, for all his bravado and loudness, Thrust is just a little bit unsure of himself. That's always interesting to see. And let's face it, any excuse for the coneheads to appear in anything, eh?

#30: Sandstorm (1986)

Sandstorm was always one of the Triple Changers I wanted. Mainly because 1. Helicopters are cool, 2. dune buggies are cool, and 3. I like the colour orange. Yeah, I was a bit special as a kid. Sadly, I never owned Sandstorm. Which made it worse all those years later when I finally saw his 'hero' episode of the G1 cartoon, 'Fight or Flee'. For those who haven't seen it, it all revolves around the discovery of an alternate universe Cybertron, Paradron. This planet is bizarro Cybertron, a paradise, basically, where a group of Autobots left the planet of their origin to seek out somewhere else they could live (sound familiar much?). Sadly for them, the Decepticons found their world, and conquered it, leading to the Autobots blowing it up. Yes, it really is that swift a decision to destroy a world by the 'heroic' Autobots.

Poor Sandstorm. As leader of the world he feels awful about this, and bids his world farewell. Only for Rodimus to mock him and remark that 'Cybertron's a better world anyway'. Douche. Still, never mind, because the next episode Sandstorm's in, he seems to have forgotten all about his erstwhile world. All's well that ends well, eh?

Other than that, Sandstorm has been very much a background player in Transformers fiction, always being around, but never doing much. Unless you count buying the farm in the Dreamwave continuity as doing something. At this current point, it would seem that he's aboard the Lost Light, looking for the Knights of Cybertron. So hopefully, he'll pop up at some point. Which is possibly bad news for those of us wanting to get his G1 self, as Rocherts will no doubt make him amazing. Gah.

As a Triple Changer, he transformed into a dune buggy and a helicopter, which as I stated earlier, is cool. He's exceedingly orange, too. I mean, almost TOO orangey. Sadly, I've never owned or even played with the toy, so I can't comment on the quality of it. Those who I've known who DO own him seem to think that he makes a very good toy indeed. So he looks to be one of the better Triple Changers.

Sandstorm's Tech Spec bio was followed almost to the letter by the G1 cartoon, he shows off his manueverability AND his ability to make dust clouds for camouflage in Starscream's Ghost. His devil maycare attitude also gets a look in, but not too much, sadly. Because he wasn't used much, we never saw it. Although in the comics, he doesn always seem to be on Wrecker's duty, so maybe that would be a factor there. Who knows, maybe one day we'll get a whole series just about Sandstorm. Until then, here's Paradron's last moments, and Rodimus being a complete douchecanoe: